Tuesday, January 30, 2007

Drill me, doc!

I guess I let freedom go to my head - it's a heady thing to be able to snack whenever I want. You might say I overindulged over the holidays, and now all that candy I ate at Christmas is taking its toll on me. I don't think sugar is in the natural diet of a wombat.



Fortunately my job has a health plan.





I was kinda scared, but the dentist was nice. And we listened to oldies on the radio while he worked on me. He knew the singer and year of every song - I think he listens to that station a lot. Or maybe he's some kind of savant.



Who wouldn't want to kiss an adorable mug like that? Lay it on me, honeys. I'm free this Saturday evening....

...maybe I should put an ad on Craigslist...

"Cute and cuddy, four-legged bundle of love looking for a hot Saturday night. Let my animal magnetism draw you into a night of sensual delights unheard of this side of the equator. Must like short men. Those with fleas need not apply."

Sunday, January 28, 2007

A wombat's gotta make a living.

It's hard to travel without spending any money, even when you're little like me. And it makes it a lot more difficult to pick up hotties. So I found me a job.

I considered pickpocketing, but decided there was too much risk of getting caught. I hear it's not such a good thing to be the little guy in the jailhouse shower. So I thought maybe panhandling would be the way to go. Some of those bums on the street actually make as much money as government employees, or so I've been told. But that didn't work out too well either. I staked out a busy streetcorner, but apparently it was some other guy's territory and he didn't take kindly to my intrusion. Boy did he smell bad. So I wasn't inclined to stick around and argue about it. It wasn't all that lucrative anyway. Apparently the passing drivers had a hard time seeing me from their cars. It's tough being short.

It was time to try a legitimate job. There were lots of ads in the paper, and what do you know, I got the first one I applied for...



...at a liquor store! I'm right lucky.






I learned how to strap beer into six packs. It's a lot harder than it looks, but I can do a whole case in a jiffy now.






I stock beer...





...and nick one for myself every now and then.







Working the register is my favorite part of the job. I love gabbing with all the customers, even if some of them smell almost as bad as that bum.



My coworkers are good blokes too.



All in all, not a bad way for a wombat to make a few bucks!

Saturday, January 27, 2007

Christmas

Christmas sure is different here in the US. It's funny to have it in the winter. I'm told it's usually even colder this time of year!



It was fun, but I was disappointed that there weren't any flaming desserts. I got lots of candy in my stocking though - mmm!
G'day mates! I'm Wombat, and this here's my blog. The title is "The Wandering Wombat" because I escaped from my owner's house (prompted by a murder attempt by one of his roommates, but that's a story for another day..) and now I'm on an extended holiday - meeting new people and experiencing things that I'd wager no other wombat ever has. I created this blog to share my adventures with the world, through the miracle that is the internet.

It's rather hard to type with legs that are only an inch long, so my entries will probably be brief, but I'll take lots of pictures!